Happy News

Yes friends we are still here, don’t worry I know it’s been a long time. I think it’s more of the fact that PG and I are unable to add to our plan at present due to lack of remembering what it is we said and where we said it!

This is due to a number of reasons, the main one being we don’t even live in the same country, who would have thought! So I totally don’t even know why I started writing this post! Anyway I wanted to cheer my self up be telling you lovely people the story of Paris Hilton being charged with driving under the influence!

I don’t really know who’s influence she was driving under, no wait yes I do I think the person’s name was margarita. Margarita was kind enough to give Paris a blood-alcohol level of 0.08 percent which meant she was handcuffed during the arrest were she was later booked at a police station.

Let’s see what Paris had to say on the matter:

The taste of booze "grosses me out" as she once told the LA Times. WTF? She later told people she only had one Margarita.

A national research study says that a 137-pound woman would need to consume three alcoholic drinks in one hour on an empty stomach to reach a .08 percent blood-alcohol level. The fashionably slender Hilton likely weighs much less than 137 pounds

I’m sorry but the one word that really shouts at me is “THREE”.

If convicted, Hilton could be sentenced to six months in jail and fined $1,000 (€788). The minimum penalty for a first-time offender is a fine, probation and alcohol-rehabilitation program.

Again the words that cause me most distress are “if” and “$1,000” I think in this day and age people should be made an example of especially if your in the public eye! The word "if" should be replaced with "Once" and another word also needs changing "could" replaced with "will" and "$1,000" replaced with "$1,000,000.

I would like to thank some american newspaper for this however i forgot to note your web address

Hello Dahlings

This is a story of two extraordinary people separated by a fuck off massive ocean….feathering a lame arse blog as I’m kinda shit at this sort of thing! Staring the most talented friends ever known to mankind!

This is all I can come up with so you’ll have to wait for the rest! It’s starting to sound like a movie already! So I’m copyrighting it bitches! Nothing Really Matters and Prophecy Girl need to make a living some how!

If you would like to cast your eyes to the right you can see our bitchin selves. Don’t we look wonderful dahlings? I feel a toast coming on! To PG and NRM!

This post is soon to be replaced with a bitch arsed one, my cofounder is writing. I know the suspense is killing you! Drinks are on me PG!

The life we’ll be accustomed too*

*subject to monetary issues, public funding and a stately home